4 posts tagged “college”

I have the ability to be completely infuriated with my school and yet too lax to really care whatsoever. It's kind of like superheated water. The temperature is enough to boil, but it just sits there smooth and innocent looking, because there's no friction in the container to allow the bubbles to form for it to boil.

I might not get to graduate, because I might end up losing credit in Berb's class for all my truancies. Something inside me said I should maybe feel a bit panicked, or worried, but I just kind of laughed. I mean, kids who got straight Ds and drank themselves drooling dumb every week end get to graduate, but a goody-two-shoes girl has to go to summer school because her fucked up school system is jinking her credits because her parents can never manage to call her in sick when she is? It's ridiculous. All I can do is laugh. It might be kind of fun to go to graduation just to watch, just to see how people react when I'm sitting with the audience and not wearing the hideous golden tablecloth my parents paid $30 for.

What's great is I had no idea. My mom showed me a paper saying I had three truancies, and the date was May 5th. I know I've skipped school since then, not including senior ditch day, and so it's not hard for me to believe that I've earned the five truancies to get to lose my credits. So, the attendance office has the time to call me down and say how I shouldn't leave without coming in and saying goodbye because it's such a big scary world out there I might die driving home and they might actually have to be responsible for something. I can totally understand how IMPORTANT that is, I mean especially compared to such unimportant things like whether I can graduate or whether I can go to college next year. So, of course, no need to call me down to the office to warn me about silly things like that.

On top of that, teachers are giving out homework still and I can't do it. I can't even bring myself to copy homework from other people anymore. It just doesn't matter to me anymore. Nothing does - but high school is definitely lower on the list. I know I should care, and I'm a little worried about how I really don't care, but nothing's going to change. If San Marin is going to be the one to pull the plug on my life and throw me for some forced changes, so be it. It has to happen sooner or later. Obviously I'm beyond self-improvement, so it's probably going to take some near-death experience to get me to give a shit at this point.

In happier news, Andre got two Robo dwarf hamsters today. They're are the stupidest, most adorable things you'll ever see. There's a fat one named Penny and a skinny one named Melly, who's completely obsessed with the wheel. She hasn't gotten off of it since we put her in the cage.

I don't know what it is, but I haven't been in the mood to post lately. It's kind of like how a lot of writers wish they had a terrible, angsty childhood because it would better their writing. There just isn't a whole lot of inspiration towards writing pages and pages about how happy someone is.

Today I took the Entry Level Mathematics test. It was ridiculously easy, but what was weird was seeing all of these people who were my age but I didn't know. I'm so used to seeing the same faces every day, then I'm thrown into a room where I know no one and yet there are many potential friends here (I saw one guy in a Humboldt shirt) and it's just.. strange. Everyone seemed unsure of how to act, except for one blond idiot in the back who talked about how he fell off the top of a golf cart. It's like, we're stuck in our teenage mindsets, but most of us are smart enough to know how to be mature, so we don't really know how to act. Do we keep up that judgmental barrier, or are we friendly and try to talk to others?

I know that there's always been more people than those at San Marin, but it was really refreshing to see physical proof that there are still people I haven't met. What's funny is a lot of people came with their parents. I was the only person I saw who drove myself, and it made me feel good. The test itself was pretty easy. There were a few I couldn't figure out and just guessed, but it wasn't extremely stressful. However, I did so much math in my head that the rest of the day I've been seeing equations. I can still remember the numbers I multiplied and all the long division I had to do by hand (no calculators).. It's freaky.

Other than that, things have been going well. I wake up at 6am everyday nowadays and it really makes a day good. Sleeping in leaves me so lazy and heavy and unmotivated for the whole day, but getting up not only gives me extra time, but I tend to sleep better and am motivated to get shit done. I think waking up with the sun and not after it catalyzes a lot of good energy for me. Plus I can't help but love it when I call someone and accidentally wake them up and then think wow, while you were sleeping I had breakfast, took a shower, cleaned my room and watched some TV.

Every time I get a day off, I don't get anything done. It's kind of weird. I bitch and moan about how much more I would do if I had the time, but when it comes down to it more time never equals more productive activity. So I've decided the best thing I can do is to keep myself busy. Somehow on those especially long days with school and tech, the motivation to get through it seems to carry over enough for me to actually do homework and cleaning and other strange things. Not to mention it makes me value the little down time I did get a lot more.

I want to get a job. Key word: want. I don't necessarily need one to survive at this point, and so I'm a bit lazy on actually getting one. However, I have the time and it wouldn't hurt to start saving up now if I'm thinking about studying abroad in college later.

This summer, I'd like to take classes at COM. I recently have been looking into Philosophy as a major, and it sounds perfect for me. There's no one career I'd be limited to, and it leaves me a lot of options for graduate school. Not to mention I'm big on thinking in theories and talking in circles anyways - you don't have to look far to find a post where I can talk about just ideas for miles and miles. It's interesting to me, and I don't find it necessary to see the cold hard results in real life to understand and enjoy a topic.

I also want to take a class in Astronomy, because it's very interesting to me but I find it's a bit hard to self-teach. The only constellation I've been able to really get down so far is Orion, and the path of the sun and planets, and finding North. What's peculiar is that the classes sync perfectly. Philosophy is 8 to 10:15, and Astronomy is 10:30 to 2. Gotta love what the universe does when you really want something.

It'd be awesome if those credits could go towards my degree at Humboldt, too. Assuming I could put Astronomy as an elective or something, that'd mean I could allow myself a freshman year taking only 3 classes. Then again, that might be against the rules or something... They probably have a minimum credit requirement for enrolled students.

Anyways, that's just me thinking out loud. Which I do a lot, especially when I'm at home. And then I'll be telling myself some story or reminder, and I turn the corner and one of my brother's friends will be sitting there with a total 'wtf' look on his face. My life..

Today I was doing a little light research on studying abroad in college, because I'm sick of never having been anywhere before and I want to really know that when I'm choosing to live in California or even in the US for that matter, that it's really the place for me. (Since there's no way in hell I could remember enough to go to France, it'd probably be somewhere like Australia.. or the UK, or other English-speakling countries. Just in case you were wondering.)

So I found this list, and I had to share it because it's so retarded I lol'd - literally. Look at #9.

1. Travel while earning college credits!
2. Try new foods.
3. Learn a new language, or put a second language to use.
4. Experience first hand different cultures and customs.
5. Increase personal confidence/pride-in-self by surviving in a different environment.
6. Looks good on a resume.
7. Become more independent.
8. Improve communication skills.
9. Gain a higher appreciation for the United States.
10. Become more ready for the ever-increasingly globalized business world.

Like going to other countries is going to make you realize how much they all suck because obviously the United States of America is TEH BEST CUNTRY EVAR.

Yeah, and according to Firefox, globalized isn't even a word either.