83 posts from 2008

I'm eighteen today. It doesn't feel like it. Now I have to be fully responsible for whatever I do. I really dislike birthdays. I don't want to celebrate mine, but if I get too freaky about it Lizzie will probably think I'm from Mars or something. It's just one of those random things I have strong feelings about.

Humboldt is pretty cool. I can't complain at all. Well, I can, but I shouldn't. I've met a lot of pretty nice people. My suite mates are awesome, we all bonded instantly and we hang out all the time and stuff which, according to the LGA Jesse, is unusual.

I'm drained though. This afternoon is the first since I've been here that I've really had the freedom to just completely relax. Of course, I have homework I should do, but nothing absolutely urgent at this moment.

Last night the girls in the room next to ours, Wendy and Lily, made cookies and wanted to give them to the boys suite next door that we share a balcony with. I was tired and had stuff to do, but I went anyways, if only just because Lizzie made me curious to see how awkward it would be. I was not let down, it was.

I left early. Lizzie later informed me that this guy Nev, who had seemed like one of the more decent kids, is a coke head. Supposedly he got really weird and was like, bragging about it and shit. It was a surprisingly big disappointment for me.

Anyways, yeah. Hope ya'll are doing good.

I'm alive. I'm in my dorm and feeling fine. I've taken 11,000 steps today and 10,000 steps yesterday. Those are like, record days for me, and I think that in reality it's just a lazy day in my regular life at Humboldt. I really enjoy it though, as much as my feet hurt from my shoes.

The first night was scary, but today I went to breakfast with a girl from my suite, then Natalie got here, then Alexis got here, and then my mom too with my aunt Kate and her adorably crazy baby in tow, and so I had like too much to do. I went to this gym place to apply for a job at the juice bar, which I'm praying I'll get because I haven't found anywhere else to apply yet.

When Alexis (my cousin) met me at school, we hung out here for a while then decided we should head over to her place. Well, she had her bike, and I had my car, and those two things didn't really want to cooperate. Eventually, with my back seats down and the front tire hanging out the back, we made it. It was amazing. Even up super steep hills where I was sure it would roll right out and kills us all, it stayed.

Her place is neat. Pink walls, and a big bed and big room and much cozier than the dorm room. Though I imagine things will feel happier once Lizzie gets here with all her stuff and the rest of the room mates fill in.

Now I'm waiting for my mom as she parties and I want to sleep and she's probably getting high with my relatives. It's so annoying. She should just sleep there.

Tomorrow I finally go to Humboldt. It's exciting, and a little scary. What's lame is I'm most looking forward to the drive. I really like driving. I feel very free and independent when I drive, but cozy and at home at the same time. I can get by in the stingiest of circumstances, with just the necessities, except for my car. I need Honda-chan. He's my best, most loyal friend. Not to mention he's pretty studly. The drive to and from Cobb mountain just recently was a piece of cake thanks to him being a manual car. It smelled like brakes going down those hills and I just laughed at everyone else with their stupid fancy cars. Plus it's much easier to haul ass up a hill when your car isn't jipping you on your engine's power with its "smart" transmission.

So yeah, Cobb mountain was great. I got to see some of the fam, and take Honda-chan on some off-roading adventures, haha. He's not much for mountain climbing, but he did better than my mom's bmw, so I'm proud. It was stinking hot the first day there, but luckily the local pool has a spring water pool from the creek. Ice cold, no chlorine.. much more to my taste. Regular pools are just so icky. The second day there we canoe-d 10 miles down the Russian river. It was nice for most of the way. We saw two blue herons and crashed our boats into a bunch of vegetation to get really close, lol, and then we saw some carp which was weird. I never knew there were carp in that river, but I guess so.

Anyways, still got more packing to do. Then I'm off tomorrow morning. Eeeeeeee wish me luck!

So just now I was going to get directions from Google, and after I typed in my home address it offered me something called 'street view.' I was curious, so I clicked it, and lo and behold not only is it pictures of my humble abode on the internet, but on top of that MY CAR IS IN THE PICTURE. If I had known I was being photographed by the internet I would have centered myself in that spot a little better. How am I supposed to help it that they make those spots for monster cars?

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I cropped it because I didn't exactly feel like posting my address on the internet, but I swear that's from freaking Google. Creeeeppppyyy. You guys should check out your houses, too.

Now I'm off to drive to some random remote cabin that I only have blurry childhood memories of. By myself. If I don't come back alive... avenge me.

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Yeah. These moods are frustrating. What's funny is the few pictures I do like of myself, I don't want to put up, because then I feel conceited when I have absolutely no reason to be. I wish I was meaner. I wish I cared less. Or maybe at least I knew how to protect the things I cared about instead of push them away and tangle myself into my own knots.

Honestly, kindness and modesty are extremely crippling traits in this society. The world's a pricey buffet. If you have what it takes to get in, all is yours. If you don't, good luck in the garbage.

This is the most infuriating article ever.

http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/death-to-the-stick-shift/

What a fucking idiot. Stick shifts are better in so, so, soo many ways than regular cars. If any of you ever have to choose which to buy, go with a stick. Don't worry about it being hard to drive. If Wei-Wei can do it, anyone can.

I like this quote the best: "Although this research didn't examine the role of the manual transmission, its potential risks are patently obvious. Operating a manual transmission is an inherently difficult and dangerous procedure..." In other words, "Though I don't actually have facts to support my bullshit opinions, manny trannies SUCK."

Grrrrrrr.

Today I went to the mall, and I couldn't find a single thing I liked enough to blow my money on. I don't know how those stores get away with charging so much for that shit. I just wanted a fucking jacket - something simple and decent-looking and warm. Of course, they have every single imaginable weird-ass shirt and neck-hanging piece of cloth that I'm not sure how the hell to wear, but no simple jackets. Unless you walk into a store where the things they sell are actually quality, but then you're paying half your college education for one jacket.

So I decided to quit and search online, maybe at least to find a hoodie or two I could layer. All I want is a simple, dark-red hoodie that is made of material somewhat thicker than tissue paper, and I swear to you it just doesn't exist. Of course, you could find every single crazy-ass multi-colored patterned hoodie imaginable, you know the kind that you need to buy five other pieces of clothing for because nothing will match it, but not just a simple dark red one? What the fuck? I really hope I just haven't looked on the right sights yet.

Anyways, while walking around, I kept noticing a lot of red plaid. Like, lumberjack status. Of course, it's all on the weirdest things, like these jackets without sleeves (fucking hate that) or some weird half-shirt with random ruffles and holes and buttons. But even when I looked for a red plaid hoodie online, the ones I could find were all so old that the actual stores that created them had stopped selling them. Of course, that could easily mean it was made yesterday, with how quickly they tear through trends.

Sigh. I used to walk into a clothing store and find a lot of good things. What does that say about me now that I can't?

I wish I could just make my own clothing. I know what I want to wear. Why is it so impossible to find things that fit what I want? Why can't people make clothing for humans, too, and not just tweenagers who are so obsessed with bright colors and pretty pictures? Those crazy, ADD patterns are out. ENOUGH. Please give me something I can wear without feeling embarassed, world.

You guys won't believe this. It's sick.. This woman is so right! We need to get back our rights and stop the rainbows! Fucking disgusting!

Last night I kept dreaming I was Bella, and that in order to save Jacob and Edward and everyone's lives, I had to scratch my ankles. I kept waking up because I was scratching my ankles so badly. It was frustrating because I just wanted to go to sleep, but for some reason my dream logic kept winning out.

Then I woke up really early, and I watched Juno. I love, love, love that movie so much. Juno herself is awesome, and I love the soundtrack. I've been listening to it all day. It makes me so happy inside. I don't really know why, it just does.

Lucas's friend still hasn't brought back my camera. What sucks is of course, the moment I pull out my cello and decide to sell it, I remember that I don't have a camera to take pictures of it. Ugh. If I can't sell it before I leave, I'll have to take it with me, if I have any hope of keeping at least half of the profit for myself.

Today Ali was telling me how her laptop recently crashed and they had to wipe the whole hard drive, and I couldn't help but feel smug. Myyy lappy is so much more awesome. I love all my stuff so much, it's ridiculous. My car and my laptop are my bestest friends. Honestly, I care about them more than Boomer, probably. That cat doesn't like me anymore anyways, because I won't let him shake his fleas on my bed and I don't feed him cheese and tuna that make him barf later.

This has been the most random post ever... Whatever.

In about two weeks, I'll be migrating North for the winter, which is completely bassackwards, but I'm totally excited. Nervous, too, but mostly just looking forward to it. I'll be getting up there really early, hopefully, so I can beat everyone to getting the jobs. Lizzie made me feel like a geek about it, lol, but whatever.

OH. The most aggravating thing ever: LUCAS'S FRIEND'S LITTLE SISTER'S FRIEND HAS MY CAMERA. SUPPOSEDLY. What the fuck. I'm so pissed. My beautiful, amazingly tough and lucky to still be around camera, with all of the pictures from the trip I still haven't uploaded, is probably at the bottom of some stupid little stoner kid's backpack while he skates and farts and breaks rules and breaks bones. Grrrrrr.. This isn't the first time Lucas just fucking forgets his shit wherever he sets it down and then it ends up his friends took it across the country or something and then forgot it on the top of the Eiffel tower. I am never, ever, EVER going to let him borrow any item worth more than ten dollars EVER AGAIN. I mean, even Andre's more responsible than that. Then again, he isn't under the influence.

In other news, I finished Breaking Dawn. It was good. Lots of changes, lots of more grown up stuff, but it was better. I'm not going to talk about it, though, because I know Akiko will just READ IT ANYWAYS. Sigh.

I want to dye my hair tonight, but I'm feeling kind of lazy. I'd rather take a nap.